One reason is that they don't have to ask for referrals because they educate their clients that giving and receiving referrals is part of the process of doing business with them.

A second reason is they don't ask for referrals and they don't know why they don't ask.

Answer: They are too busy selling, trying to get to the next sale to form outstanding client relationships to quadruple referral introductions, testimonials and sales.

Outstanding Client Relationship means: You enjoy doing business with the client and the client enjoys doing business with you.

In order to quadruple your referral introductions, testimonials and sales without making one cold call you must make a list of clients that you ?¢‚Ǩ?ìhave or had?¢‚Ǩ¬ù an outstanding client relationship with. ?¢‚Ǩ?ìHave?¢‚Ǩ¬ù means that you currently have an outstanding client relationship with and ?¢‚Ǩ?ìHad?¢‚Ǩ¬ù means that you have just lost touch with the outstanding client relationship ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú for whatever reason.

Make a list of all of your ?¢‚Ǩ?ìA?¢‚Ǩ¬ù clients and rate each one based upon the following criteria:

• You enjoy doing business with the client and the client enjoys doing business with you
• You provide excellent customer service to the client
• You look forward to meeting with and doing business with the client
• The client trusts you and you are looking after all or a substantial amount of the client?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s business
• The client has a significant business and/or family network
• The client fits within two to three marketing niches that you have chosen to work with

The reason that profit and net worth are not included is that these are not going to matter in relationship to Referral Introductions, Testimonials and Sales if you don?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t have an outstanding relationship with the client.

If you are having difficulty making a list of clients that you have an outstanding relationship with, you are likely behaving too much like a salesperson and not behaving like an advisor. The salesperson?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s behavior is too impatient to develop deep customer relationships and the sales person is too busy selling to develop deep customer relationships.

Outstanding relationships take time to develop.

The first step towards this is you must have an outstanding relationship with yourself. This means that you know your values, you have identified and met your unmet needs and you have a vision, purpose and mission.

The second step is you must take the time to relate to your clients when you are communicating with them.

To help you to discover what may be preventing you from building outstanding relationships, please see the following points from ?¢‚Ǩ?ìBeing?¢‚Ǩ¬ù An Advisor:

#5
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Leads with a profit generating product.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚ÄúSells too many products.

#6
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Loves to talk with their clients about what their client wants to talk about. The client wants to know what you are going to do for them not so much about the product.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Loves to talk about their favorite subject, themselves and their ?¢‚Ǩ?ìflavor of the month?¢‚Ǩ¬ù product.

#7
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Seeks to serve.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Uses sales techniques.

#8
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Takes a genuine interest.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Builds rapport.

#9
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Is elegant and professional.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Tries to sell during the appointment.

#10
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Emphasizes deep client communication because of their emotional intelligence.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Insensitive and avoids deep client communication because they are under pressure.

#11
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Makes clients feel at ease and develops trust because the clients feel the advisor is at peace with who they are, that the advisor has adequate funds to be in business,and the advisor has ample time to be with the client.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Makes clients feel nervous because they sense a lack of energy, money and time.

#12
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Looks after people who have money.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Tries to look after people?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s money.

#13
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Believes every client transaction must be profitable.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Does a lot of favors.

#14
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Feels fulfilled from the inside through the work that they do for clients.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Does not feel acknowledged by the work that they do for clients.

#15
The Advisor ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Educates clients that providing referrals is a part of their
business process.
The Sales Person ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú
Is afraid to ask for referrals because of fear of rejection
or they are afraid they will be questioned ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú ?¢‚Ǩ?ìhow can I give you a referral when you are not doing a good enough job?¢‚Ǩ¬ù?

For the complete article on, "Being" An Advisor, CLICK HERE

Step 2 ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú Identify If You Are Complete With Your ?¢‚Ǩ?ìA?¢‚Ǩ¬ù Clients That You Have or Had An Outstanding Relationship With

Beside each name on your list of ?¢‚Ǩ?ìA?¢‚Ǩ¬ù clients that you have an outstanding relationship with write down either, ?¢‚Ǩ?ìComplete or Incomplete?¢‚Ǩ¬ù.

Complete means:

You can instantly pickup up the phone to communicate with your outstanding client relationship no matter how much time has passed by. If this is the case read on to Step 5.

Incomplete means:

Just that. There is something that you are incomplete about that is preventing you from instantly picking up the phone to communicate with your outstanding client relationship no matter how much time has passed by.

To gain a deeper understanding of ?¢‚Ǩ?ìincomplete?¢‚Ǩ¬ù let?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s take a look at its meaning:

• Not complete or total; not completed; "an incomplete account of his life"; "political consequences of incomplete military success"; "an incomplete forward pass"
• Not yet finished; "his thesis is still incomplete"; "an uncompleted play"
• The grade assigned only if a student is temporarily unable to complete course requirements because of unusual circumstances.
• A grade in a course for work that has not been completed.

As you look at the above definitions of incomplete, and consider your past incompletions?¢‚Ǩ¬¶.

Do these bring up any emotions in you?

How about the emotions of:

• Anger
• Fear
• Guilt
• Shame

Do these bring up any beliefs and emotions in you?

• Anger at yourself for not staying in touch?
• Fear that the client will be angry with you and just simply reject you?
• Guilt that you could have done a better job?
• Shame for not following through?

What is stopping you?

Two things.

Anger, fear, guilt and shame are one.

The second is you likely don?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t know what to say, which I?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢ll cover in one of the forthcoming steps.

Step 4 ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú Get Rid Of The Anger, Fear, Guilt and Shame

Getting rid of or clearing emotions is a very simple process. It is not a silver bullet either. It must be done a number of times to really take affect and it is well worth it.

All it takes is a little time and the awareness that you are in charge of your emotions and that they are not in charge of you.

There is a saying; ?¢‚Ǩ?ìForgiveness clears limiting beliefs and emotions?¢‚Ǩ¬ù.

All you have to do is repeat the following forgiveness process;

• Forgive me for feeling angry at myself for not staying in touch.
• Forgive me for feeling afraid that my client will be angry with me and just simply reject me.
• Forgive me for feeling guilty that I could have done a better job.
• Forgive me for feeling ashamed for not following through.

There is a saying; ?¢‚Ǩ?ìForgiveness reminds you of positive beliefs?¢‚Ǩ¬ù.

Your next step is to repeat the following;

• Forgive me for forgetting that my clients will be very happy to hear from me
• Forgive me for forgetting that my clients receive / received outstanding value though working with me and my company
• Forgive me for forgetting that my clients will be happy to help their friends, associates and me to grow my business

Step 5 ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú Make The Calls ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú Here Is The Script For Referral Introductions, Testimonials & Sales!

Question 1.
How are you? How is (business, car, family, health, hobbies, home or travel)?

Question 2.
Is there anything that I can do to improve my service to you?
If advised that service is required, record information, thank client that it will be done and that you will follow up in 1 week and confirm that progress is being made.

Question 3.
I am looking for ways to improve my service to best serve my clients ?¢‚Ǩ¬¶

Question 4.
To find ways to design my business around people like you, I would really like your help and input.

Question 5.
What do you like best about the work that we do together?
Be ready! Write down the answers the question.

Question 6.
What could I do to improve the way I work with you?
Be ready! Write down the answers the question.

Question 7.
Is there one thing that I do for you that you didn?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t expect?
Be ready! Write down the answers the question.

Question 8.
______________, thank you very much for kind words. I would like to send you a copy of you comments you?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢re your edit and approval ?¢‚Ǩ¬¶ I?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢ll get them out to you and follow up in a few days.

Question 9.
Who do you know that would appreciate the same kind of service that you could introduce me to?

Click here to the view the slideshow - it is really worth taking the time and you will be glad you did;

http://www.photosbykathryn.com/promo/

2. Communicate - take the time on a human basis

3. Eliminate - do not tolerate

4. Fabricate - an organizational structure

5. Orchestrate - a system for everything

6. Motivate - recruit, train, and facilitate

7. Indoctrinate - share your vision

8. Delegate - but do not abdicate

9. Congregate - to communicate by listening

10. Compensate - performance related

11. Educate - role play and courses

12. Create - a fabulous environment

13. Recommended Reading List

Step 1. Appreciate - It's not just at 5pm on a Friday

The 4 Universal Truths Of Why Your Team Members Come To Work:

• Money
• Appreciation
• Fun
• Environment

Money
The number one reason why your team members come to work is for the money. In the long run, the money doesn?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t make your team members happy and the money will help them to enjoy their misery.

Appreciation
We are talking genuine appreciation. It?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s not just 5pm on a Friday as the team member is rushing out the door to be with their friends and loved ones ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú ?¢‚Ǩ?ìOh Jane, thanks for taking care of ______________, I really appreciated that!?¢‚Ǩ¬ù

There is a better way. In fact there are at least two.

One of them can be during your quarterly review process. Prepare a list well in advance of all the things that you are noticing that the team member is doing right.

An even better way is to catch your team member doing things right it the moment.

Fun
We all like to have fun at work. Your team doesn?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t need to have permission to crack a joke. Make sure that you take your team out as a group and have some fun. A group who stays together, goes out and plays together. At the end of the week, it?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s not the business or the practice management that holds the team together, it is the memories the team creates together.

Environment
Make sure that your office is nicely decorated and looks like the 21st Century, not the remnants of 1950?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s. No magazines that are five years old, dirty washrooms, dead plants and please, don?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t drag in the used recreation room furniture once your teenagers are done with it. Make sure that the staff room is clean and nicely appointed and that it does not look like the black whole from Calcutta.

Step 2. Communication - take the time on a human basis

The employees in a professional practice are often under a great deal of pressure and communication can often turn into routine communication about operations and after a period of time, employees no matter how well they are motivated by performance incentives can begin to resent each other. This can be especially true about employees and commission sales people that are working together. This kind of resentment can start to leak out into communications with the client in a ?¢‚Ǩ?ìhe said?¢‚Ǩ¬ù / ?¢‚Ǩ?ìshe said?¢‚Ǩ¬ù.

Remember to take the time for the human side of communication and take the time for coffee, lunch and non-work related communication.

Step 3. Eliminate - do not tolerate

Sam Walton the founder of Walmart had all of his employees bagging groceries the first day on the job where he applied his one bagger, two bagger and three bagger assessment theory.

The new employees were assessed based upon the number of grocery bags they filled at a time while working at the check-out.

• Three baggers are natural enthusiasts and they always end up as Regional Managers

• Two baggers are competent and they do the job exactly and start and end on time 9 - 5pm

• One baggers are professionally miserable people. They are BMW?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s (Bitchers, Moaners and Whiners). They whine about the customers, the prices, their colleagues, the weather, they whine about everything.

One baggers are one baggers. One baggers will drag you down, they will drag your team down and they will sabotage your business.

One baggers often do the job competently, so you will have to smoke them out. One baggers have got to go. Smoke them out of your organization, and it will take you 1 ?Ǭ? years.

How do you do this?

Send your employees on customer service courses, professional development courses, and hold regular staff meetings.

If you have a ?¢‚ǨÀútemporary?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢ one bagger, an employee who is going thru a difficult period in their life, give them the time and space to recover. You need to distinguish between the temporary and the permanent.

Over time, with the focus on customer service, professional development and team meetings, the one bagger will simply leave on their own. The positive team environment will simply be too uncomfortable for them, and they will leave to find another organization to invade.

Step 4. Fabricate - an organizational structure

Read or reread, Michael Gerber?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s E-Myth Revisited.

Get out of Management!

Instead, create a team of people who can create a business for you. You cannot grow your business yourself. Select your people based on their skill set and the appropriate Values & Behaviors for the position.

Stop being a control freak within your own business. Control freaks will make a living, but they will not make any money.

Step 5. Orchestrate - a system for everything

• Finance

• Marketing

• Personnel

• Resources

• Sales

Build your business like it is a franchise. Why?
Because franchises don?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t fail; most of them succeed.

Why build your business like a franchise? So you can have a life.

Step 6. Motivate - recruit, train and facilitate

Management is about systems.

Leadership is about people.

How do you motivate your people?

You can threaten them or you can lead by example.

• If you are miserable, then everyone in the office has permission to be miserable.

• If you are late, then everyone in the office has permission to be late.

• If your finances are a mess ?¢‚Ǩ¬¶ and so on.

Leadership is about getting out of the trench first and saying ?¢‚Ǩ¬¶ ?¢‚Ǩ?ìfollow me!?¢‚Ǩ¬ù

Step 7. Indoctrinate - share your vision

• Vision

• Mission

• Roles

• Goals

What if your team was asked where the boss is going with ?¢‚Ǩ¬¶

• 5 year plan?

• 3 year plan?

• 12 month plan?

• 30 day plan?

• 90 day plan?

What would their answer be?

If your team of people doesn?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t know the plan, then it?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s just a job for them. It?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s not a career. Think about that.

Step 8. Delegate - but do not abdicate

Abdicate ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú Dump vs. Delegate

When delegating answer the 5 W?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s & the How!

• Who?

• What?

• Where?

• When?

• Why?

• How?

You must acknowledge to yourself that you can?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t do it all. You have hired a support team to do exactly that, to support you and the business. So let them. Learn to delegate.

Give clear instructions on what you want done, and give a clear deadline on when you need the task complete by. Then walk away.

If they persistently fail, replace them. The weakest link ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú is between your ears. Your employees will rise to the challenge.

Step 9. Congregate - to communicate by listening

Here is a meeting schedule that we recommend:

• Daily 15 minute meetings ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú a daily huddle

• Weekly meetings ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú that last an hour

• Monthly meetings ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú that are ?Ǭ? a day

• Quarterly meetings ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú that are a full day

• Annually ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú 2 day meetings, a retreat, an overnight. To review your 3 year plan, your one year plan and your 90 day goals.

You think that the lost revenue from all of these ?¢‚ǨÀúmeetings?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢ is going to make your business less profitable.

WRONG.

Secondly, there is nothing that builds a team more, than the time away together from the office.

Step 10. Compensate - performance related

• Provide a good basic wage

• Increase the good basic wage in line with the cost of living

PLUS

• Offer a performance related bonus / pay it once a year in December every year ( = 2 months wages / an extra month?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s wage for all payroll staff)

• Cost out the performance related bonus a year in advance along with the costs, income and the profit to be shared

• Measure the key performance indicators how you like

• Performance can relate to:

  Clients
  Memberships
  Profits
  Sales

Step 11. Educate ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú role play and courses

Provide:

• In house training
  
• External training
  
• Professional and personal development
  
• Role play
  
• Feedback

Start thinking like a retailer and provide ?¢‚ǨÀúwow?¢‚Ǩ¬ù customer service.
Successful Practice is 98% people and 2% financial planning.

Step 12. Create - a fabulous environment

Chris Barrow developed The Environmental 100 Assessment Tool for your business.

To receive your copy e-mail; lreilly@leadingadvisor.com and type in the subject line; The Environmental 100 Assessment Tool

The Environmental 100 is a tool to assess the environmental health of your business. Use it to identify areas for focus. The intention is to help you become well organized and to create a more pleasant working environment. (You may also learn yours is already among the best!). It focuses on five areas:

• Sight

• Sound

• Touch

• Smell/Taste

• Relationships/Culture

Step 13. Recommended Reading List

The 8th Habit : From Effectiveness to Greatness
Stephen R. Covey

Building Happiness Centered Business
Dr Paddi Lund

Leadership from the Inside Out
Kevin Cashman

Shackleton?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s Way
Margot Morrell & Alexandra Shackleton

So if 60 is the retirement goal -

So if you are:

40 you have 20 years x 24 paydays ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú you have 480 paydays to get it right.
45 you have 15 years x 24 paydays ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú you have 360 paydays to get it right.
50 you have 10 years x 24 paydays ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú you have 240 paydays to get it right.
55 you have 5 years x 24 paydays ?¢‚Ǩ‚Äú you have 120 paydays to get it right.

Hmmm!!

We are talking about an opportunity to work together on Succession Planning

* Values = Why we do what we do.
* Behaviors = How we do what we do.

Values & Behaviors Assessments can be used to Benchmark the Values & Behaviors of the;

* Owner
* The Business
* The Successor

I believe it was Ted Rogers that said, a succession plan should be ten years in the making. What do these 12 names have in common:

Bronfman
Cuddy
Bentall
Mitchell
McCain
Steinberg
Billeses
Bata
Eaton
Phelan
Pritzker
Maritz

These companies all tried to manage financial wealth with a lack of communication wealth. They had no or incomplete succession plans.

This resulted in millions & millions in company losses and lawsuits.

In some cases they even lost the company.

In some cases family members have been banished from the company.

* 37% of business is family owned
* 70% don?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t make it past the 2nd generation
* 90% don?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t make it past the 3rd generation

All these large companies, built by very smart people, were torn apart by jealousy and suspicion.

The choice is to Understand or to Judge. If there is Judgment it is impossible to Understand. We Judge what is different or what we do not understand. When we understand we have empathy, respect and wisdom and we join with members of our business and family.

The choice is to Understand the Values & Behaviors of the Owner, the Company & the Successor.

Or NOT!

• a Team Building Workshop with a Financial Services Firm
• a Conflict Resolution Session between two partners

When we are consumed by the fear based ego mind it is impossible to deal with;

Concerns & Issues

based on

Limiting Beliefs

charged with

Emotion

with

Unmet Needs

at the core.

Conflict & Judgment will continue when there is No System to Communicate with the Concerns & Issues based on Limiting Beliefs charged with Emotion with Unmet Needs at the core.

When there is no understanding, there is judgment. When there is judgment, there is no understanding. Judgment and no understanding is a venomous breeding ground for the fear based insane ego mind to look for differences and fault.

According to Dr. Wayne Dyer, the Ego is made up of the following ingredients.

1. I am what I have. My possessions define me.
2. I am what I do. My achievements define me.
3. I am what others think of me. My reputation defines me.
4. I am separate from everyone. My body defines me alone.
5. I am separate from all that is missing in my life. My life space is disconnected from my desires.
6. I am separate from God. My life depends on God?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s assessment of my worthiness.

The all consuming ego blocks communication with it?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s obsession of outside perceptions of what others think of possessions, achievements, reputation, body image, life image and worthiness.

"Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark ?¢‚Ǩ¬¶ Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours." -Ayn Rand

You Didn't Have "The Conversation" relates to the business person that shares with their colleague - "just right out of the blue, my spouse just left me without warning".

?¢‚Ǩ?ìThe Conversation?¢‚Ǩ¬ù would have gone something like this ?¢‚Ǩ¬¶

The business person shares with their spouse from time to time over the course of a 25 year period a Vision.

That they are a team and that the business person is working for the greater good of both of them and their family.

That for the early to mid years of the business persons working life, the business person would be burning the midnight oil working the extra hours to lay the financial foundation for their family, their home, their investments, children?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢s education, travel, resort home and retirement. As the business person enters into more of the fruitful years of the business, there will be more time for the two of them to enjoy the fruits of the labor. That again, the business person is doing this for the both of them so that there can come a day, that they can enjoy each other on a full time basis traveling, visiting friends and enjoying leisure activities together.

What happens is ?¢‚Ǩ?ìThe Conversation?¢‚Ǩ¬ù doesn?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t happen and the spouse that isn?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t working isn?¢‚Ǩ‚Ñ¢t included or communicated to and just as the business person is nearing ?¢‚Ǩ?ìtheir?¢‚Ǩ¬ù dream, the spouse that is not communicated to retaliates for a lack of inclusion and leaves.

Is this because you didn't learn how to emotionally inspire yourself in the beginning of your working life way back when?

If you haven?��Ǩ�Ѣt already emotionally retired, when will emotional retirement happen to you?

When you are 35, 40, 45, 50, 55, 60, 65 or - or again, has it happened, or is it happening right now?

With the cost of retirement looming and compounding by the minute, can you, your business or family afford for you to emotionally retire?

Read on to;

• Understand emotional retirement
• What you can do so that emotional retirement does not happen to you
• What you can do if emotional retirement has already happened to you

Please note that the following is a snap shot of the foundation that I use in the 'Leading Advisor Coaching Program'. Whether you are a seasoned professional making seven figures or just starting out, this information applies to you and will save you many years of struggle down the line.

So what is emotional retirement?

We've given emotional retirement many different labels in the past. Burn out, funk, slump, unmotivated - and within the word unmotivated lays the crux of the problem.

Motivation just doesn't work. Motivation is unsustainable. Motivation only lasts for a short period of time.

I should know. I owned an Anthony Robbins Franchise from 1990 - 1995 which was #1 in North America from 1991 - 1992 for the sale of the video based Unlimited Power Weekend Seminar. The Unlimited Power Weekend Seminar was all about motivation. I honestly stood back at times and said, 'how come this stuff doesn't work'?

From 1993 to date I have extensively studied Coaching, Counseling, Emotional Release Work, Family Systems Theory and Inner Child Work to deepen my understanding to gain the answers and develop a system to create a Scientific Approach to sustainable motivation.

And guess what, motivation cannot be sustained.

Here is why.

Let?��Ǩ�Ѣs look at the source of the word motivation in the dictionary.

'Motive - the sense of need, fear, etc. - Webster's Dictionary.

Why on earth would you want to be motivated by a need or fear?

For if you take action based upon the avoidance of a need or a fear you may very well get the results and in the end, you will still be haunted by the need and the fear. And as soon as you meet the short term need or fear, poof, your motivation went away until the next time you are in need or fear. Not a happy existence.

Need

A need cannot be met by something outside of the self and examples are: by a person, place, possession, position etc. A simple example is how many times have you heard a person say, 'I'll be happy when I make the million dollar level'

One of the most common unmet needs is 'recognition'.

If you have an unmet need, the unmet need is the foundation for a series of limiting beliefs and emotions.

The unmet need of recognition is what leads to your emotional retirement.

Here is why.

The unmet need of recognition is something that was left over from your childhood development.

It is a dysfunctional source of motivation for you to give and give and give your time and energy to people with the belief that they will recognize you for the great work that you are doing to complete the piece of childhood development. The only challenge is again, an unmet need cannot be met by a person, place, possession, position, etc.

At the same time, as you struggle to get your unmet need of recognition met you carry limiting beliefs of 'It doesn't matter what I do, people don't appreciate it, they just seem to take and take and take.'

There is enough quantum physics theory around today that I don't have to go into the scientific explanation for you to agree with me that;

• Thoughts are real forces (John Kehoe - Mind Power)
• You attract what you think about
• You are what you believe

The unmet need coupled with the limiting beliefs leaves you with an array of emotions that include; sadness, anger, disappointment, rejection etc.

So at the end of the day, you say to yourself; 'Why bother, what is the use'. 'It doesn't matter what I do, people don't appreciate it, and they just seem to take and take and take.' And you give up.

Worse yet, you are feeling bitter and angry because you gave and gave and gave your time and energy to people without getting your need met.

Fear

A fear is based on a painful emotion caused by impending danger or evil or state of alarm which again is based upon something outside of the self. A simple example is that the person's fear in the above example was motivated by the limiting belief that 'there isn't enough money', and I suggest that even though they make the million dollar level, there will always be;

• another person with more money that they can compare themselves to and remind them that they don't have enough and that they are not safe
• another place to go to that costs more money than they have to remind them that they don't have enough and that they are not safe
• another possession that costs more money than they have to remind them that they don't have enough and that they are not safe
• another position that someone else has that reminds them that they are no good enough and that they are not safe

Another common unmet need is 'safety'.

If you apply the same theories from the above on the need of recognition that I offered around the relationship of an unmet need to limiting beliefs to emotions then the following would apply;

• Unmet need = safety
• Limiting belief = clients, business, money etc. are hard to get
• Emotions = anxiety, fear, worry etc.

So with this deadly combination brewing beneath the surface you approach your clients and business appearing to be very needy and self absorbed struggling to get your needs met from your clients and business and you just can?��Ǩ�Ѣt seem to close a sale.

And worse yet, you can't even see it. But your clients and colleagues do. I am sure that you have heard the expression, 'they are so far behind that they think that they are first!'

Instead of having a consciousness to add value to your client and business your subconscious and conscious minds are preoccupied with managing your own needs, limiting beliefs and emotions and you simply do not have the space to give your client and business the 101% attention that they need.

So at the end of the day, you say to yourself 'why bother, what is the use.' 'Maybe I should have listened to my mother and gotten a steady job with a steady pay check'. 'Maybe I just wasn't cut out to be someone in business or on commission'.

So on a side note, the next time you hear 'Motivational Speaker', RUN!

In summary, trying to get motivated to get out of Emotional Retirement will continue the struggle of trying to become 'inspired' by trying to get needs met and fears eliminated by something outside of the self.

The key word is here is 'inspired' and trying to get 'inspired' by something outside of the self is impossible.

'Inspire - imparting an influence on the mind and the soul - Webster's Dictionary.

So how do you systematically create sustainable inspiration from the inside out?

Let me offer this very simple and very effective example.

In advance of every day;

• Define your Values.
• Define the Feelings that you want to experience as a result of expressing your Values.
• Define the Positive Beliefs that you want to experience as a result of expressing your Values and Feelings.

The above is not a silver bullet or quick fix. There isn't one. I believe it was Jim Rohn that said 'success is a few simple disciplines practiced every single day'

You have heard the old saying that 'it takes 21 days to break a bad habit'.

Here is my 21 day challenge, for the next 21 days I challenge you to do the following exercise in your journal;

I observe my Value of _______ is being met and therefore I feel ______ resulting in the Positive Belief that _________________________________.

Here is an example using my business situation;

I observe my Value of Teaching is being met and therefore I feel Excited resulting in the Positive Belief that my writing skills are getting better and better and I am adding more and more value to the clients whom I serve.

Here is an example using a business situation that might apply to you;

I observe my Value of Listening is being met and therefore I feel Passionate resulting in the Positive Belief that my research and presentation skills are getting better and better and I am adding more and more value to my clients every time I offer a proposal.

Here is another example using a business situation that might apply to you;

I observe my Value of Abundance is being met and therefore I feel Excited resulting in the Positive Belief that I am attracting more abundant and qualified clients through my actions and thoughts.

Again, please note that this is a snap shot of an extensive component of the "Leading Advisor Coaching System".

The outcome is for you to create "More Profit & More Time".

For a list of my Values go here;
http://www.leadingadvisor.com/about/values.html

For the Complete List of Values go here;
http://www.leadingadvisor.com/resources/archives/2005/01/values_workshee.html

For the Complete List Feelings go here;
http://www.leadingadvisor.com/resources/archives/2005/01/feelings_worksh.html

I would very much like to hear from you about the results that you have created for yourself as a result of doing this exercise so that you can be an inspiration to yourself and others.

Please e-mail me at; sreilly@leadingadvisor.com

Tues., June 14, 2005
Values Based Goals

Mon., June 13, 2005
Left & Right Brain Goal Setting

Fri., June 10, 2005
Final Web Site Completions

Thurs., June 9, 2005
Reading List

Wed., June 8, 2005
Zippier Public Speaking Titles

Tues., June 7, 2005
When Your Father Is Ill

Mon., June 6, 2005
Toronto Coaching Study Group

Blog Definition - A frequent, chronological publication of personal thoughts and Web links.

A blog is often a mixture of what is happening in a person's life and what is happening on the Web, a kind of hybrid diary/guide site, although there are as many unique types of blogs as there are people.

People maintained blogs long before the term was coined, but the trend gained momentum with the introduction of automated published systems, most notably Blogger at blogger.com. Thousands of people use services such as Blogger to simplify and accelerate the publishing process.

Blogs are alternatively called web logs or weblogs. However, "blog" seems less likely to cause confusion, as "web log" can also mean a server's log files.

Do you want to be motivated by need, desire and fear or your values? Values are the only form of functional inspiration, versus motivation. Values are something that naturally pulls you forward without a lot of effort.

Most people, without being aware of it, are motivated from the outside in.

You hear it all the time, I'll be happy when I; make more money, have more time, close that big case, have a bigger practice, get a new car, go on a holiday, etc -

And your dysfunctional part of your ego mind says 'is this all there is?'

So let's go way back in time -

To that fateful day - come on, you remember that day when you were just waking up from that lucid sleep and you were thinking - what am I going to do today?

And then bang! Then it hits you! Holy s**t! I quit my perfectly good job that my mother told me to keep and became an entrepreneur and started my own business! And you started the first day of the many days of the rest of your life waking up unemployed without a guaranteed pay check. You didn't feel that safe did you?

So without really knowing it, instead of going out and adding 100% value to your clients, your dysfunctional part of your ego mind worked at getting the need of safety met through your clients. You have to go out and sell! You have to pay your mortgage and God help you if you don't.

You ran after any prospect that could fog a mirror and as you approached each one your dysfunctional part of your ego mind was thinking 'please buy my product!' Your dysfunctional part of your ego mind was thinking 'I really need this sale because I really need to feel safe! Please save me! If I could get this one sale then I would feel good and feel worthy!'

And you recreated this pattern time and time again trying to get the need of safety met through your work and again, outside of yourself.

And to make matters worse, as soon as you reached a goal, which was linked to the need of safety which cannot be met from the outside, your dysfunctional part of your ego mind said 'is this all there is?'

And this continuing pattern of emotional highs and lows is what contributed to your probable adrenaline addiction also.

Why are most Advisors Addicted to Selling?

One reason is your dysfunctional part of your ego mind says 'is this all there is?' And while you thought that money would bring you a certain level of fulfillment it didn't and this is because money doesn't bring fulfillment which can't be met through outside motivation because it is dysfunctionally based to begin with and likely linked to the need of safety.

Another reason is the need of safety which your dysfunctional part of your ego mind has been trying to meet from the outside in is still not met.

And one is now addicted to the new need of adrenaline.

So the pattern of 'is this all there is?' will repeat itself. While you are asking this question the motivation will go away and so will the money earning until the bank account goes down and you create another fateful day - And then bang! Then it hits you! Holy s**t! I quit my perfectly good job and I have to go out and sell!

:-) And then your dysfunctional part of your ego mind thinks 'That's OK, at least I'm motivated!'

What is the answer?

Inspire yourself through clarifying your values, behaviors, vision, purpose and mission for long lasting fulfillment which is based upon service to others.

Then your dysfunctional part of your ego mind will not be saying:

• 'Is this all there is??'
  
• And keeping you busy 'SELLING' so that you don't have time to;
  • Create a new Vision for your business
  • Delegate or Eliminate Unprofitable Activities, Clients & Products that you are struggling with to break free
  • Switch to Wealthy Clients
  • Reduce Your Profit Mix to The Most Profitable
  • Carve Out a Niche Market or Two
  • Attract and Hire a Crack Support Team
  • Develop an Internet Niche Marketing System
  • Switch From Free to Fee

The Continuing Addiction to Selling will likely result in more of the following -

• Operating without a vision or business plan
• Fearing change
• Having to get pumped up to sell
• Working without the necessary staff
• Selling too many products
• Overselling
• Making too many promises that they fail to deliver on
• Doing too many favors
• Feeling unacknowledged for the work that they are doing
• Having conflict with management, staff and clients
• Keep hiring the wrong people
• Having poor customer service
• Failing to create strategic alliances
• Failing to ask for referrals
• Having no succession plan

Some interesting statistics;

'35% of Canadian Advisors are still operating without a written business plan.' - The Advisor's Guide to Building Business Volume 3 Published by TD Mutual Funds.

33% of financial advisors are past the age of 60

23% of financial advisors have no succession plan for their business